Cyclist are a peculiar bunch. We can’t let a ride just be a ride. It’s impossible for any of us to admit that a bad day on the bike is due to anything but external circumstance that we have not control over. We all do it.
At the beginning of a ride we lay out at least one disclaimer of why we’re not going so well. If it weren’t for this disclaimer you’d be inflicting all sorts of pain on the rest of your mates, so they should consider themselves lucky.
1. I think I’ve got a slow puncture
2. I haven’t ridden my bike in weeks
3. I’m on a recovery ride
4. I’m so hungover. I was out until 4am partying but I was still able to meet up this morning
5. I just didn’t get a chance to eat lunch today…
6. I must have eaten something dodgy at the cafe
7. I’m so tired, I just couldn’t sleep last night
8. My brakes are rubbing
9. I’m more of a climber (on a flat ride)
10. I’m not really a climber (on hilly rides)
11. I stopped to go to the toilet
12. There was a red light that I had to stop at
13. I nipped off to do a Strava segment I found
14. I’m coming back from a stomach virus
15. My position feels strange today. I couldn’t generate my usual wattage
